Has your relationship lost it's spark?
Do you find yourselves…
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Arguing about the same things over and over again?
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On the brink of separation or divorce?
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Feeling like you’re roommates rather than partners?
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Like every interaction is a battle?
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Lacking a healthy sex life?
Are these relationship struggles spilling over into other areas of your life?
Perhaps you’re finding yourself sitting at work thinking about the fight you had with your partner last night rather than listening to your boss during a meeting.
Your friends are pulling away because all you find yourself talking about lately is how bad your romantic relationship is doing.
As you drift further and further apart you find that you’re spending more and more time on your phone. Time that was once spent on the relationship is disappearing into the black hole of social media and doom scrolling.
The bigger the rift grows the further into anxiety and depression you fall.
You find yourself putting all of your energy into constantly checking on your partner. Where are they? Who are they with? Why won’t they just text you back? You have no energy left for the things you like to do.
Or maybe the opposite? You’re spending all of your energy avoiding your partner. So much so that you’re obsessively making sure that you don’t interact. You spend so much time away that you don’t remember what your own backyard looks like.
Reclaim your spark, reconnect, and grow.
Together.
You deserve a relationship that brings out the best in you.
By opening up new ways of communicating, healing past hurts, and deepening your connection your relationship can become the foundation upon which you build a life together that you’re proud of.
You can talk without arguing and solve problems together without it turning into a fight. You can build trust and confidence in your relationship so that your time and energy can be dedicated to doing things you enjoy. You’ll be able to tune back into your work, friends, and your life once the volume of conflict in your relationship is turned down.
Breaking free from relationship patterns that no longer serve you can empower you to flourish in new ways.
Your relationship can be different. It can be so much more than it is right now.
Reclaiming your spark isn't a pipe dream.
I can help you learn new ways to communicate and connect with each other. Let’s work together to clear out the cobwebs of past conflict so that you can focus on the present and enjoy your relationship again.
Together we will work to dismantle the relationship patterns that are keeping you stuck in cycles of conflict. We will look at what’s working and not working in your relationship and target areas of growth to bring you relief. Working as a team we can rebuild your relationship so that it better aligns with your vision for the future and your goals.
Through our work together we can make lasting change in your relationship so that there is room for your spark again.
Couples Counseling Can Help You...
Manage Conflict
Build a Life of Shared Meaning Together
Increase Positive Interactions
Improve Communication
Deepen Your Emotional Connection
Boost Intimacy
Methods
Gottman Method
The Gottman Method can be really beneficial for you because it’s a research-based approach that focuses on strengthening relationships through practical, easy-to-apply techniques. It’s grounded in decades of research by Drs. John and Julie Gottman, which means it’s proven to work for all kinds of couples, no matter the challenges they face. Here's why it could be a good fit:
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Evidence-Based: The Gottman Method is rooted in scientific research on relationships. It uses data from thousands of couples, so it’s not just a set of theories; it’s been shown to work in real-life situations.
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Improves Communication: One of the core aspects of the Gottman Method is teaching you how to communicate effectively. It helps partners understand each other better and express yourselves in a way that avoids unnecessary conflict.
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Builds Trust and Intimacy: By focusing on the key pillars of friendship, admiration, and emotional support, this method helps you create a deeper emotional connection. It’s not just about resolving issues; it’s about creating a stronger, more supportive relationship overall.
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Practical Tools: The Gottman Method gives you concrete tools, like the “Four Horsemen” (common communication pitfalls) and “Love Maps” (understanding each other’s world), to prevent problems from escalating and build a more resilient partnership.
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Focus on Strengths: Rather than just focusing on problems or weaknesses, it helps you build on what’s already working well in your relationship. This shift in perspective can feel empowering.
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Conflict Resolution: Conflict is inevitable in any relationship, but the Gottman Method helps you handle it constructively, reducing negative interactions and helping you move toward solutions in a healthier way.
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Customizable: Whether you’re newly dating or have been together for years, the Gottman Method is adaptable. It can be tailored to your unique needs and goals, which means it doesn’t rely on a one-size-fits-all approach.
By incorporating these techniques into your relationship, you can build a stronger bond, navigate challenges more effectively, and create a deeper, more loving partnership. It’s about not just surviving as a couple, but thriving together.
Relationship Intensives
Relationship counseling intensives can be incredibly beneficial for you because they offer a focused, immersive experience that accelerates progress in a way traditional weekly sessions might not. Here’s why an intensive approach could be a great fit:
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Accelerated Progress: Traditional therapy often takes place once a week, but an intensive allows you to dive deep into the issues over a shorter period of time, whether it's a weekend or a few days. This means you can make significant progress in a concentrated burst, tackling multiple issues in a more timely manner.
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Focused Attention: With an intensive, you’re not sharing my time with other clients during that same day. It’s all about you and your partner, and I can dive deep into understanding your dynamics and needs. You’re able to work through more complex issues without the time constraints of a regular session.
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Immersive Experience: The immersive nature of intensives helps you step away from your daily routine and distractions, which can make it easier to focus entirely on the relationship. It creates an environment where all partners are fully present and committed to improving things, which can deepen your understanding of each other.
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Personalized, Tailored Approach: Since intensives involve more time together, I can provide highly personalized guidance and tools that are specific to your relationship. The process is tailored to your needs rather than a generic approach, making it more effective.
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Emotional Breakthroughs: Some issues or patterns take longer to surface or are harder to address in shorter sessions. With an intensive, you’re more likely to have those breakthrough moments, where old wounds or unspoken feelings can be safely explored, which leads to greater healing and understanding.
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Quality Time Together: An intensive often creates a space where you and your partner(s) can communicate without the distractions of daily life—work, kids, and other responsibilities. It’s a chance to reconnect and focus purely on each other, which can help rebuild the emotional bond.
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Immediate Tools and Solutions: Instead of leaving a session with just an outline of what to work on in the weeks ahead, intensives offer the opportunity to immediately practice new skills and coping strategies. By the end of the intensive, you’ll often walk away with concrete tools and strategies to use in your relationship moving forward.
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Focused Resolution of Issues: If there’s a specific issue or crisis that’s creating tension, such as infidelity or communication breakdown, an intensive can offer a more direct way to address it. You don’t have to wait for weeks between sessions to make headway on something that feels urgent.
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No Long-Term Commitment Right Away: Some people might hesitate to commit to long-term therapy, but intensives allow you to see the benefits of counseling in a short period of time, without a long-term commitment. It’s a great way to decide if ongoing therapy would be useful after seeing immediate results.
In essence, intensives can provide you with a deep, transformative experience in a condensed time frame. It can be a game-changer for couples who are motivated to make serious progress in a short period of time or need to resolve issues quickly.
Frequently Asked Questions
Q: How do you ensure balance between partners in sessions?
I encourage partners to engage with each other as often as possible. This isn’t a game of ping pong where each of you hits a ball to me and I bounce it back to you. This is about your relationship so I focus our sessions on you communicating with each other rather than communicating with me. I will help you learn new communication tools and will be your guide and coach, but my goal is for you to speak with each other as much as possible.
Q: What are your fees and do you accept insurance?
Relationship counseling: $140 Relationship Intensives: Varies based on package. See the Intensives page for package pricing. (Link) I do not accept insurance at this time. Relationship counseling is rarely covered by insurance unless one person is identified as ‘the problem’ or ‘the client’. I view the relationship as my client and do not view one person as the problem. Instead, I prioritize the relationship and view the issues you bring to a session as belonging to the relationship. For these reasons I do not work with insurance for relationship counseling. Insurance does not typically pay for intensive therapies.
Q: What can we expect in our first few sessions?
Our first few sessions will be spent getting to know each other. I will gather relationship history from you initially as well as relevant family history. Then we will each have an individual session together where we gather individual mental health and relationship history. Following these initial sessions you will complete a comprehensive suite of assessments that we will then discuss in a follow-up session. We will use our gathered histories and the results of your assessments to build a treatment plan that will then guide our following sessions.
Q: Are you open to working with us individually?
Only if it is clinically appropriate to the relationship work we are doing do I see relationship counseling clients individually. I do not provide individual therapy to members of a relationship counseling client unless it is solely focused on the relationship work we are doing in relationship counseling. This will be discussed with all partners before a set number of individual sessions is conducted.
Q: What if one of us doesn't want to attend therapy or is hesitant about the process?
If someone in your relationship is feeling hesitant about relationship counseling I encourage you to reach out to schedule a free 15-minute consultation so that we can discuss any concerns or anxiety points that may be putting up roadblocks to accessing relationship counseling.
Q: How does confidentiality work in relationship counseling?
As a general rule I will not discuss what we talk about in your individual assessment session with your partner(s). However, if there are things that come up during this session that need to be discussed in the conjoint sessions I will encourage you to bring it up. Secrets prevent relationships from healing and relationship counseling will not be effective if we are not open in the therapy space. Otherwise, the same confidentiality rules that apply to individual counseling apply to relationship counseling. We will discuss this in detail at our first session.
Q: How do you handle it if one person wants to stop therapy or one partner stops coming to sessions?
If one partner wishes to end therapy we will explore this in session and discuss it together. My goal is to support the relationship and if we feel that we are done with therapy or we are not getting what we need I want to discuss it with you. If one partner stops attending the remaining partner(s) and I will discuss this and work together to determine what a path forward is.
Q: How do you handle conflict or disagreements between partners during sessions?
In our first sessions together I will let you have your conflict or disagreements so that I can see what conflict looks like in your relationship. As we progress in therapy I will interrupt the conflict cycle, we will discuss what is happening, and then we will try a new skill for conflict management. I will coach and guide you through the new skill and you and your partner(s) will try it together in session.